Grandpa

There’s this song out there – makes me cry every time.  Carrie Underwoods Temporary Home..can’t get the homes not to be blue, sorry.

Little boy, 6 years old
A little too used to bein’ alone
Another new mom and dad,another school
Another house that’ll never be home
When people ask him how he likes this place
He looks up and says with a smile upon his face

“This is my temporary home
It’s not where I belong
Windows and rooms that I’m passin’ through
This is just a stop, on the way to where I’m going
I’m not afraid because I know this is my
Temporary Home.”

Young mom on her own
She needs a little help got nowhere to go
She’s lookin’ for a job, lookin’ for a way out
Because a half-way house will never be a home
At night she whispers to her baby girl
Someday we’ll find a place here in this world

“This is our temporary home
It’s not where we belong
Windows and rooms that we’re passin’ through
This is just a stop, on the way to where we’re going
I’m not afraid because I know this is our
Temporary Home.”

Old man, hospital bed
The room is filled with people he loves
And he whispers don’t cry for me
I’ll see you all someday
He looks up and says “I can see God’s face

“This is my temporary Home
It’s not where I belong
Windows and rooms that I’m passin’ through
This was just a stop,on the way To where I’m going
I’m not afraid because I know this was
My temporary home.”

This is our temporary home

I saw the video on the television a few days before my Grandpa died – it was a moment where I knew he was leaving me.  Happened, the last verse was the part I tuned in to.  It’s been almost 4 months and sometimes I do ok, other times I miss him so terribly.  I can’t say I’m grief stricken because I worry that I’ll never see him again.  I know, as in Brad Paisley (my self-proclaimed and husband approved boyfriend 😉 ) says in the song “When I Get Where I’m Goin”

I’m gonna walk with my grandaddy,
and he’ll match me step for step,
and I’ll tell him how I missed him,
every minute since he left.
Then I’ll hug his neck.

I think, when I cry, I’m just missing him so much. Contrary to the song “Heartbeat Away”  from the movie Charly, forever seems like forever away.

Don’t you fret – I’m not going to move the process along to reach him any faster! – in an interview I did with him around Christmas time, his advice was “Be Happy” – ironically the same thing his mom, Grandma Hart, told me too just before her promotion.  So, I’m being happy and seizing a wonderful opportunity to travel to a far away mysterious land.  It kills me inside that I can’t share everything with him and hear him on the other end of the phone (we talked everyday when I got home from work as I do now with Grandma).  I miss him more and more each day. I suppose it has to get worse before it gets better.

Today my little Cub that I interpret for and I were talking about facial hair.  Grandpa was smooth sometimes but often had a little scratchy scratch to his face..weird the little things you remember and miss.

If there’s internet access in Heaven, Grandpa – I’m missing you terribly today!  I can’t wait to catch up.

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